The Riddler Interview Tape Transcript

Tape 1

 * Hugo Strange: Do not fret, Mr. Mayor. Everything is under control. I promise you.
 * Quincy Sharp: It's not that I don't trust you, Hugo. It's just... it's just that the headaches, the pain. They come all the time now.
 * Hugo Strange: Continue to take the medication.
 * Quincy Sharp: But...
 * Hugo Strange: It is late, Mr. Mayor. You are tired. You need your sleep.
 * Quincy Sharp: Of course. I need my sleep.
 * Hugo Strange: You will hang up now.
 * Quincy Sharp: I will hang up now -
 * Hugo Strange: Imbecile.
 * The Riddler: I couldn't have put it better myself.
 * Hugo Strange: What! How dare you enter my office?
 * The Riddler: Oh, I'm not in your office, and please, don't insult me by attempting to trace this broadcast. You will fail.
 * Hugo Strange: I take it I am talking to Mr. Edward Nigma?
 * The Riddler: Do you know of any other inmate in your twisted little penitentiary who is ingenious enough to arrange this little chat?
 * Hugo Strange: Narcissism. A compulsive desire to prove his intellect and a predilection for riddles.
 * The Riddler: You've read my file.
 * Hugo Strange: Of course.
 * The Riddler: Good. Then let's get started. How do you attempt to understand what is going on in Arkham City when all of the answers are STRANGE?

Tape 2

 * The Riddler: Good evening, Hugo. I believe it is time for our one-on-one.
 * Hugo Strange: No. It is time for you to stop this and give up. My TYGER guards will find you and when that happens, I will perform the procedure on you myself.
 * The Riddler: Procedure? Oh, you mean what you did to all those poor fools back at the Asylum. To be honest, I think you did them a favor.
 * Hugo Strange: How do you...?
 * The Riddler: How do I know that you requested access to all the most... forgettable patients and proceeded to melt their brains with the help of that confused milliner? Or did you mean, how do I know that you have been providing the ex-warden with your own special medication, no doubt intended to render his synapses more malleable to your suggestions. Or maybe you are currently wondering if I know about the secret panel in your closet. How it slides back to reveal what you want most. How you sit, wearing that suit, crying into your hands as you question whether you are really worthy.
 * Hugo Strange: What do you want, Mister Nigma?
 * The Riddler: Oh, that's easy. I want exactly what you want.
 * Hugo Strange: And what's that?
 * The Riddler: Batman. Dead. Humiliated. But dead.

Tape 3

 * The Riddler: Knock, knock, Professor. Guess who?
 * Hugo Strange: I grow tired of these insipid games, Mr. Nigma. If you wish to speak to me, my guards will escort you safely to my tower.
 * The Riddler: Please, Hugo. If you're going to set a trap, at least pretend to try harder than that.
 * Hugo Strange: No traps, Edward. I simply wish to grant you safe passage through Arkham City. I think the time has come for us to meet as equals.
 * The Riddler: You, Strange? My equal? I am the man whose cunning will soon have Batman lying at my feet, bloodied and broken.
 * Hugo Strange: Really?
 * The Riddler: Then I will pull off his mask and look into his dull, dying eyes. In that last instant he will know that I have finally beaten him and I will finally know who he really is.
 * Hugo Strange: My apologies, Edward. I see now we are nowhere near equals.
 * The Riddler: Finally.
 * Hugo Strange: You see, like me, you are obsessed with the Batman, but unlike me, you don't know who he really is. Do you?
 * The Riddler: What?

Tape 4

 * The Riddler: I know you are lying, Strange. There is no way that you could have figured it out. It's some kind of trick. It must be.
 * Hugo Strange: Oh, I used no tricks, no childish puzzles. I simply created a psychological profile of the man most likely to be the Batman, and then matched it against the most logical candidate. I was right, of course.
 * The Riddler: Well, who is he?
 * Hugo Strange: Ah, but that would spoil the game for you, wouldn't it?
 * The Riddler: You must tell me! I implore you, Strange! I...
 * Hugo Strange: Really, Edward. If I could figure it out, it must be child's play for you.
 * The Riddler: But I... I...
 * Hugo Strange: Interesting. Tell me, Edward. How is the Riddler like a blank dictionary? You're both at a loss for words.